Nobody likes to be thrust into a new situation where they don't know what to do or how to act. It's very uncomfortable. The only thing that makes it worse is to have someone there who's aware of your discomfort, and belittles you for your ignorance. Not only is it embarrassing, it's just bad manners.

Want to be left alone or talked about behind your back? Be a snob. Make people feel uncomfortable. Even point out their deficiencies to others. If, on the other hand, you want to manage people efficiently, be looked at as a "team player" and be spoken of nicely whether you're in the room or across the country; put people at ease and make them feel appreciated. They'll reward you with their loyalty and hard work. So, how do you go about doing this?

Get the Name Right

Don't you just hate it when people mangle your name? Say a person's name correctly, and most often, and you'll have his attention. Contort or truncate it beyond recognition and you'll lose him, maybe for life.

It's one of the simplest ways to establish a good business relationship, and yet so many people mess it up. Don't be one of them. Instead, take the time to listen and to observe. It's a moment very well spent.

Here are some suggestions on how to do this:

• Take careful note of how the other person introduces herself.
• Repeat any unusual pronunciations you hear to make it stick in your mind. If the other person hands you a business card, make a note on the back of the odd articulation so that you can say it correctly the next time you talk to that person.
• Don't assume familiarity. Call the other person by his or her formal title until they invite you to call them by their first name.

Don't forget the golden rule

"Treat others like you want to be treated."
It's a simple rule, but one that's seldom followed in business. For some reason, we tend to show deference only to those who are higher up on the organisational chart than we are.

Yesterday's secretary might be your boss tomorrow. Don't leave a trail of verbal victims in your wake, even if you're in a particularly bad mood. It will come back to haunt you.

Whether you're managing a company, a department, or your household, remember that you set the tone for those in your charge. How effective you are with your staff is a direct result of your 'people skills'. The better you 'play' with others, the more influential your group of playmates becomes.

Now this doesn't mean that you have to be everyone's best friend. Far from it. You can be fair, honest, and just with others without knowing their favourite colours or the name of their daughter's cat. Keep a professional distance, yet show respect, empathy, and interest. A kind word or thoughtful action goes a long way in 'rallying the troops'.

Studies reveal what great managers already know - salary isn't the primary factor in motivating people. Recognition and appreciation rank well ahead of money.

Be nice to others. It will pay huge dividends. In short, mind your manners. Treat others how you'd like to be treated and remember: build bridges with people, don't burn them. You never know where your path may lead someday.